onlyone

2011-03-10T10:36:00.000-08:00

Life changes and changes just how long will it lasts? i been sitting at the living room everynight how to make my family better? its true other family other countries are worst than me though but how they feel in my situation? i want to said is different people put in different efforts and their heart in the family...

2009-05-22T06:59:00.000-07:00

hao ren zheng de mei you hao xia chang zhen de yao zhuo huai ren ma????????

2009-05-07T09:11:00.000-07:00

SO MUCH TO THINK SO MUCH HARD THINGS TO DO ....to reach the point of what they call success tired tired thinking differently like others negative ideass

2009-05-02T05:00:00.000-07:00

who can i said to who ??????? who will know what am i thinking now very sian very very lei. i see him like that i very sian everyday like that want to let him go also cant want to let him stay also very CHAN wat should i do to help him le? very confuse to everythink.. go out with friends also very sian stay at home also very sian work also very sian life is so so sian ......... i cant see the light anymore i don no where to head on the path is very diffcult to choose is too dark who will bring the light up agian i cant see anythink ...... i need help .............................................................................
今天我心情有一点怪怪可是说不出到底为什么好像有一点悲哀的徵兆可是病因不知道头上有橘色的加州阳光我的口袋只有黑色的柳丁我只有一个蓝色的感觉不要问我为什么很想说但又感觉没有话好说我只恨我自己逃不出这监狱或许我是个没有出息的小虫不该一直作梦你不是个英雄叶子用坠落证明换季可我昏昏沉沉没有办法醒你愿意做个英雄还是你会要放弃天是亮的却布满乌云所有焦距被闪光判了死刑你想做什么英雄我看你不过是佣兵我只想哭只想哭只想哭我只想哭只想哭只想哭今天一起床我就头痛不管吃了几瓶药都没有用心情有一点莫名的焦躁你离我越远越好外面有橘色的加州阳光我却躲在自己孤独的黑洞我只有一个小小的要求就是请你Leave me alone我只想哭只想哭只想哭我只想哭只想哭只想哭

2009-03-27T06:07:00.000-07:00

Time just past so fast ..... can let go anot is still a mistery i really don no myself le really don no really don no haha wat can i do i don no le. i have wasted my time at that moment i should be more care and more but even though will i suceed anot i really don no really hahahahahaha

2009-03-01T04:43:00.000-08:00

woah tomorrow practical test omg study diaozzz sian sian

2009-02-18T07:30:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow theory test omg last min study again GOD i need to change ahzzz next week practical test dame consomme ,carrot soup,two sauces

2009-02-05T05:27:00.000-08:00

Today cook three soups first one is carrot soup second consomme third pea soup its quiet complicated when starting to learn but if understand the steps it will much more simple. NO matter how much i focus i just cant remember how to do it but i wrote down so it make me simple but i realise i start to forget think very easily i also don no why .

2009-02-02T19:58:00.000-08:00

I'am already season le i don feel anything .Now i only care about my study other than that none of my business i don't care how others feel i just want myself to be happy don care anything.i very very very tired. i don want to thing anythink just study.france i'am coming !!!!!!! no more no more.yeah!!!

2009-01-31T11:41:00.000-08:00

The new year has over problem gone now get back to study le nothing more to worry about anymore study is in the first place and thanks god i had save up more and more money to do wat i want. my plan is coming very very very soon it will succes very soon. i don no how to said this out really don no leh ai ya don want to write liao very sian le HOW TO UPLOAD PIC AT HERE?

2009-01-27T05:59:00.000-08:00

everytime saw her i just cant forget the past why i just could stop it the only things is prevent see her so i just keep avoid her,how i wish we are not related than things will maybe different maybe we could be together but it just a lie for myself i drank alot today to make me feel Giddy but it turns to headach so painful !!!! how does she do that and what really happen in the passt i really cant remember i NEED and answer !!!!!!i need an answer.i really cant remember i really need and answer maybe this is the thing i need to know so that i will know i will become like that ????if that thing does not happen. NOW i WILL maybe Really become a different person

2009-01-23T05:35:00.000-08:00

HOW long more to go i also don no?who can i trust? everybody telling different story??why am i so stress up for something that is not important? how does he do it so well to don care everything i also want to be like him even his family is so break up i see him like nothing is happening in his life like that he is still so happy and living so happily ??? teach me how should i do?everybody is saying this is none of ya business to thing about is all up to adult but do you have the problem like me ?do you have?and even you can don care anythink.can you feel that the problem is just Keep flowing throught ya brain and think and think again. I WANT TO GO FRANCE I WANT TO SUCCED IN MY LIFE I WANT TO EARN ALOT OF MONEY I WANT I REALLY WANT as i succed nothing will happen agian in money problem even using any dirty way i will get it done no one can stop me no want can block me nothing stand in my way ..no one NOT EVEN my parents!!!!!!!! school friend are just a blocking my way to succed no more friends in school. they are evil they only want to block my way block my succed and prvent me in succed.
NOT ANYMORE NOTHING STAND IN MY way ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

2009-01-20T07:57:00.000-08:00

WHY WHY must everyday qurrel why must ?????????i just cant help them to stop ?i'am so useless............reallly very sian ALL because of the FUCKING MONEY CAUSES i'am really sick and tired more and more tired..fuck the chinese new year FUCK UP LIFE..how i wish i'am not the lucky one to born in this fucking world all the CB people all the problem all the study all the friends all of it FUCK everything................i can only listen but cant do anythink for them fuck up really becoming a very very sian world JUST LEAVE ME ALONE .........

2009-01-04T07:22:00.000-08:00

Am i just a person to let people who are boring times to chat..i doubt so..tomorrow starts school le. getting use to it of alonessss world nothing gonner change in my way anymore nothing nothing. this scars will stay forever !!

I did a lot, I know you sayI've got to get away."The world is not yours for the taking"Is all you ever say.I know I'm not the best for you,But promise that you'll stay.'Cause if I watch you go,You'll see me wasting, you'll see me wasting away'Cause today, you walked out of my life'Cause today, your words felt like a knifeI'm not living this life.Goodbyes are meant for lonely people standing in the rainAnd no matter where I go it's always pouring all the same.These streets are filled with memoriesBoth good for detected painAnd all I wanna do is love youBut I'm the only one to blame.'Cause today, you walked out of my life'Cause today, your words felt like a knifeI'm not living this life.But what do I know, if you're leavingAll you did was stop the bleeding.But these scars will stay forever,These scars will stay foreverAnd these words have no meaningIf we cannot find the feelingThat we held on to togetherTry your hardest to rememberStay with me,Or watch me bleed,I need you just to breathe.'Cause today, you walked out of my life(stay with me, or watch me bleed)'Cause today, your words felt like a knife(i need you just to breathe.)I'm not living this life

2008-12-30T09:14:00.000-08:00

Finally got chose in to the course le now is time to settle my school fees and everything le...
sian very very sian also don no y everyday like that

2008-12-29T03:38:00.000-08:00

I don no why everybody is so so think about me is my apperence really does matter about them .but why I don deserve anythink from them my life is suck and i really hate myself my character !!!! please stop being so nice to me i'am really sucks sometime things had done cant be change is always a mark on it. even people had forget but there always still a mark on myself. is only myself i don no wheather i can forgive myself i really don no really don no..when i can study i don want to study and waste alot of time now i really want to study but i cant because of some COLOur blindness what the fuck is wrong with my life!!! really hope i can make it to the course i want to go really!!!!!!! don no why very blank everytime like i don no why myself sometime somethink very small matter i could think antill very stress i also don no why???haiz very sian very very tired..................................................

2008-12-28T01:08:00.000-08:00

tomorrow is my orentation day le. Continue the FUCKING life and same thing happen all over again in school. What Gangster wat friendship wat love all will start again i totally hate this world with all this people. i don no wat will happen in the end. very sian i believe the fortune teller said to me..my life alot of back staber.i WISH TO DIE BUT I CANT DIE .......how to continue all this boring life.
wats the point of regreting after you done something is really bad.wats the point of sorry for wats thepoint of liveing for . very tired CUT away my emotional line and nothing will be in the brain anymore le better get back to reailty that wont happen i know is all only wat i think only haiz...why there is so many people cant understand each other cant let each other win a bit why people must be so self fish .why do i keep on thinking. why i just cant get over it why?????????

2008-12-26T06:30:00.000-08:00

Four days of trips at genting. still normal school reopen soon le require large sum of school fees le. need to work more to get the amount of money to get wat i want. still got alot alot alot of things need to fullfill myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i need alot alot alot of money i need to study hard le. i went to see a fortune teller at genting he point out alot of my points. which is some is true. now i know some of my fate wat i should head on and wat i should do in my future le!!!!!!

2008-12-21T08:28:00.000-08:00

Ite starting soon le janaury 5 Cleamantie ITE sian ......culinary course /plus sign on navy!!!!
2 years complete everythink? hope so becoming chef .i also don no wat to choose anymore i really don no wat is my intrest just pick the most that i want to work as!!!!even can choose other course but still got a problem lice in it which is colour blind dame it!!!!!!!!!!haiz living without some colour starting to forget alot of think le .memory is getting suck an suck like everythink just don before all forggotten le life very sian le !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-12-15T19:36:00.000-08:00

MY first golden money has in $1000 next target 2000 coming soon!!!!!!!!

2008-12-06T07:59:00.000-08:00

Finally work is getting more and more money also come in more and more le i really want to save money le. Going to ITE soon need to buy books need alot of money and saving to buy my own car!!!!! LAMBOGINI merci.... not sure when can i GET but i will definetly get it . going on with my plan march $2500-3000 ,First car ,honda fit/honda civic.$100 for the coming chrismas.
$1000 is coming in le 6 more days to go !!!!!!YES.main piority :WORKING than family than friends ..... hmmm today dame tired !!! when reach working destination around 2.00 set up everythink le than the guy said don want to be there. we was like wtf than we also had not much time left le need to be fast to set everythink on THE SECOND floor carry the table everythink DAME IT . HAIZ so tired le than 3 hour at there than go back shop than unpack everythink le than still must take MRT come back home DAME man BUT all this is worth it because $$ hope work more work more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-12-04T08:11:00.000-08:00

Today work at the musem very boring also quite tired also le along with me was jairus.Than after work go back shop unpack things than dennis sent us to clementi than i and jairus take train le he stop at red hill than i need to continue my journey to tampines WTF!!! so far le ... i play my psp on the way back sunddenly not sure at which stop le there is a young lady (so called) sitting in front me like one to sit don want to sit than i see her also not so many people in the train than i see wat the fuck she is doing than she finally sitted down than i continue play my psp le but after a few more stop beside the lady is ....... than said hi le than i continue play my psp before i saw ...... i thought everything is find le i think i will stop thinking so much stop but everytime somethink bad is out of my heart there will always conform another think POP out DE. must like everyday think thINK THINK THINK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i really don like sick and tired of it why am i is the so lucky one to born on this freaking pathetic world to suffer . i know i am not the only one who is suffer and is not the one who suffer the most pain one but i really very tired le very very very tired le HEN LEI AR
FUCK TUB LIFE
WHY!!!!!!!!!!!
WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'am really a coward want to die but scare of pain wtf is that man i really useless really suck i'am so FUCK TUB..
anyone understand me ?know me?know wat am i thinking? wat i really want? wat i really wish FOR?
just FUCK IT THATS ME CANT SAID TO ANYONE BUT TO TYPE OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-12-03T10:15:00.001-08:00

Finally back to work le althought not so much working hours but target still on le by next year march $2500 hope can reach till my expitation le!!!! everyday is the same think leh still finding for wat i really one to be next time!!!!!!! tomorrow continue work le GOGOGOGO
HATED LIFESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

2008-11-28T07:53:00.000-08:00

Never work today so go to DUDE house to slack le .O he quitted smoking le how does he do that i ask him .his reply was playing com .....and GF accompany motivate him .. oh thats a good thing hmm everyday is different. don no tomorrow what will happen ??????????
can i get over it ?
i also don no don no wat to do no aim nothing plain just like a zombie without any feeling thinking le

2008-11-27T11:23:00.000-08:00

Just finish work reach home today at ACM /Asian c....... musem at city hall le. very sian but at lease wont think so much ba .. just waiting for paid to settle all my depts so shack .
i really hope one day i could find my aim wat i really want to do or not i really very very FAN
also don no FAN wat must make physical tired than sleep or no cannot sleep le haiz very sian ar life is so boring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-11-26T09:47:00.000-08:00

Nobody understand !! nobody i don no wat to do le empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
empty empty empty empty
E M P T Y
WHY will i keep thinking?
thinking of nothing
am i crazy ?
empty
lonely
sad
moodless

2008-11-26T08:47:00.000-08:00

I don know what i'am stressing about and i'am don know wat i thinking about i just keep felt that life is so boring really le. i feel that all people surrounding are all fakers i also don no why i think like that i really don no why!!! i don why ?is it beacause of money? or wat i reall don know !!! haiz!!!!

2008-11-23T07:44:00.001-08:00

~WHY~
Why there is human?
why there is Cheater?
why there is so many problem we must face?
why must we suffer in this pathetic world?
why must we think for others?
why people are so selfish?
why am i thinking so much Q?
why am i so bastard?
why am i so so so so sad????
why people have sences?
why must have emotional?
why must we have feeling?
why does why called why ?
why am i so stupid to ask all this stupid Q?
why am i still thinking ?
why me why not others why me why why WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I really DON no WHY

2008-11-23T07:30:00.000-08:00

today is another day missing the days that was very happy nothing much .just went out to fetch my cousin came back from japan as they follow the school for exchange culture than after that find my freind Kanesh working at bk we slack awhile than i went back home le.
than at night meet my cousin again find HIS wat BAnANA /BADANA don no than after that cm home le nothing to do .. i want to go back work AHHH so boring at home ar.

2008-11-22T11:02:00.000-08:00

The chalet has past 2 days le but i just still cant forget with all of them i also don no why.i went out with wei qi, gulam yesterday .Y? because we got the same feeling !is a kind of don know how to explain de feeling wei qi think of ..... gulam think of ...... somethink like that after the chalet .before the chalet nothing happen nobody seems to stress any problem but after the chalet and they seen the person they like very much they will start to think le ! i don know why this few days i cant sleep well really don no why my mind is totally blank .i DON NO WHY!!!!!!!!!
i need a doctor to cure the emptyness in my heart .very very stress ! also don no stress wat!!!!!!!!
hmm i want to go back work pls call me Lavish!!!!!i don want to think anymore le i cant take it le AHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-11-20T03:23:00.000-08:00

the chalet had ended so fast and not so smoothly cause today is the day we checked out our chalet le than qurrel with other people almost fight. haiz but at last still ok le. i drank 4 bottle of that we total bought 7 broke two accident than go buy two more is like wasting money .than i and mahathir cycle to the beach with johan le i was a bit drunk at that time my mind was a bit unstable le .my mind just cant stop thinking whenever i see ta.but for ta maybe is just normal ba but for me is very very different de .i just act very de normal with ta le just like a normal friend le normally i see ta i will very pai seh i also don no why the only thinks i know is i lost the chances i had and it is very very very diffcult to win back le maybe not even one chance is too late le . my mind now is very confuse really very confuse don no how to explain my feeling really don no le.actually could forget ta de but this few days keep see ta you will feel like seeing her everyday don no well i need time to forget le keep a part from each other is the best way that my feeling wont be so pain de.i don no really don no how to said le!!!i can only said my self is so weak so coward dare not face the truth but if you face the same problem with me you will understand le

2008-11-12T05:30:00.000-08:00

i can see that i myself had change alot very hard to commuticate with them she ask me for money and i said i need to get stable first but she insist me to give so i left with no choice.i choose the Lavish catering as my current job as the pay is reasonable even though it is very far.i learnt new things met new people and the working place is always different.i know the feeling how our parent hard earn money means already not truthlly know yet but i got some of the feeling already.show and real life really is different wat bad things next time also can change in to good things

2008-10-29T09:50:00.000-07:00

Working two job i though i could cope not anymore.... today get paid today see doctor wat the fuck man gastric dame 150 dollar my paid and half gone to the medical fee dame it i am going to work more hard to earn back that amount of money!!!!!!!!! my mind now is only money now nothing else $_$ don want to courrupe my life with some think useless like wat young people are having now. don no wat i mean nvm as long i know wat it means ...

2008-10-25T10:56:00.000-07:00

i'am thinking which job to choose Lavish and Bk i really don no also
BK 1 hour 4 dollar transport back than monthly paid than food provided one bus reache airport.
Lavish 1 hour 6 dollar transport back sometime when there is driver but at bukit batok and food provided than if work less than 27 dollar they will round up to thirty dollar than but very far..
which too choose leh???? haiz people at lavish very very friendly BK all CB faces don no which to choose than bk must entertain those fussy and arogant people but lavish is totally opposite!!! which one??

2008-10-24T08:41:00.000-07:00

finally today got pay hmm enough for me and bought some grocerise for home and top up ez link all hmm just enough for everything.
i want to make myself busy and tired as when come to the night i could properly sleep
tomorrow got to work paid comeing on 7 soon BK and Lavish got to choose one of it!!!

2008-10-23T08:04:00.000-07:00

today is quite a turf day as today gone to work again haiz main piority money $$$$$
nothing much actually just keep all things back to the normal shelf and clean the plates all hmm lunch provided but the office is dame far!!!!!!!!! at bukit BAtok woah is so far i need to take to jurong east than change to middle platform than take bus 189 stop at a temple walk in dame so far man but still worth it $$$$$$

2008-10-20T09:37:00.000-07:00

Already two days of working in the Lavish company but this two days its just a plain job!!
i need to get my PSP fixed because of the LCD screen and the speaker haiz still cant cover my PSP amount dame it but Lavish is also quite a good pay an hour for 6 dollar and working is like only there is funtion. ok Lavish is a food company so is something like a buffei like that than funtion is like somethink like event which means is like waiter but not really a waiter also cause need to carry alot of things and is very very the tired but never mind money still in pocket!!
life is still the same study work retired go sleep in coffin liao it just so boring but still need to live on cause people never thought when they die how they die where they die so just live on till the day has come ba !!!!!!!!!

2008-10-04T05:56:00.000-07:00

MY UNlucky day!
Today woke up i've got to choose one of this option
first :go eat breakfast with dad and my sister as today is their birthday
second:i need to go down to my mom shop to help the helper as my mom is overseas to malaysia
third: i need to stay at home to look after grandpa as today also my grandma mother death anniversery she's going back to her brother house to pray.
i could only choose the last option haha
nvm i stay at home playing com and my flu started nvm i start picking up phones every ten minute .i also don no why the phone keep ringing or not is grandpa need this need that!!!
the most piss me off is one of my auntie call my house and ask wheather tampines area raining anot!!!!!!
my dad was back home with my two sister so i continue my game than later grandmother coming back. my grandma sister son send her home and also could take newspaper from our house they use newspaper to wrap their flower as their business is flower shop they need alot of newspaper.so my job is to bring the newspaper go down haiz when will it end?
i came home after bringing down with my dad i finish bathing and going to mom shop to help out than grandma ask my dad wheather he had bought the newspaper for today my dad forgot.
my grandma ask me to go down buy and i was a bit piss off but she said she wanna go buy haiz do you think i wanna let her my father also said want to go buy than i take the money go buy.
go to my opposite block newspaper no more than go 4 blocks away from home still don have than go to shell station and buy.when i reache home i called my dad to sent me to mom shop . when i reach i ask the auntie need my help to wash the cloth or buy food for her?(my mom scare she no time to buy food as could be busy)than she said no need just one word no need...
i go take train to repair my phone just nice today it spoile the button could'ten press .DAME!!
i take the train from bedok than reach KEMBANGAN i realise simei also have the sony shop to repair phone than take the train back!!!reach simei phone back to normal can press already
than i thought that maybe a few days later it could spoile again so i kust bring it up .when i reache the floor i saw the shop was upgrading . DAME!!!!
i take MRt to bedok back to meet my friend GUlam he want to go find job with me.
so we go to marina square as i wanted to work at a CD shop. when i reached it was upgrading too woah so feeling punching myself .
than we walk around in the mall. but actually it was move down to the first floor so i leave my phone and name to the guy incharge. than leave the place . i remember that my sister morning ask my big sister to help her to take a shoe at raffles city so i thought since i was near i could go and help her take .... she tranfers money to me and i reache there findin the shop than i found and it was FUCKING closed too woah DAME
i went home straight !!!!!!!!!!!
i reached home than sleep at the sofa..
my da sis was back with my two small sister as my da sis bring them to go eat swensen to celebrate birthday. than went they reache home they was very happy.
than my father bought a cake for them to cut.
so they started to place the present on the table and the cake on the table all by them selves and want to cut the cake but my father was not at home my mother was overseas my er sis working grandma go watch opera left me and da jie to celebrate with them. MY THINKING WAS WHY CANT WE JUST LIKE OTHER FAMILY TO CELEBRATE TOGETHER HAPPILY ????
IF CANT, WAT FOR BUY THE CAKE PUT AT HOME TO CELEBRATE THEMSELVES
i really very very tired give me a break GOD!!!!!! i hate it TOTALLY nobody understand my feeling nobody. starting to feel really really empty.. this house was fill full with people but their heart was not in here . i don no why , why i would think this way i know i may be very self fish but u just don no why and last dame the flu my most sway DAY 4/10/2008

2008-09-25T06:48:00.000-07:00

Today though of going to school but did not wake up in time.
i feel very empty leh....
how ar
i got a feeling of study but i don no when everytime take out book just like don want to study got a kind of feeling but just don no how to explain haiz.
ZZZ
my life is so fuck up zzzzz
must study MUST STUDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
no matter wat must study!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3 more daysssssssss

2008-09-24T04:37:00.000-07:00

Today went to school. day by day we always could see people qurrel, fighting all staff without all this human will not invent BOMB anymore.
some people could be very patient but some people don!!
i don no myself could hold how long.
i only wish i could be more petient ti whatever things.
hmmm
5 more days to my exam..i so screw up by the subject what to do .
Its all cause by myself lazynessssszzzz .
haiz
after exam also feel nothing just that life is just boring boring boring!!!!
sian sian sian ahh
just how boring is life
if my time is up ,may be i'll said o why my life end so fast i don wanna die!!!
haha thats just human always said different different kind of staff
i double people who are reading don understand what i'am writing but that just me
~_~

2008-09-23T05:23:00.000-07:00

Yesterday stay over night at my friend house jirus
He is one of my best friend .i though of studying at his house but at last we did not as i am very sick of studying.
so we went out to have our supper "prata"
He live at red hill and he live himself!
He taught me how to play guita "Qing tian"
still learning !!!!
exam is around the corner
i'am still lack of lots of things in my maths and science
tomorrow going to school
but as usual no people is going only 6 out of 42 student going !!
hmmm people getting older are really afraid of death.
why teenagers or young adult never thought of death?
because of things around them keep them not to think about it
but people always cant keep themselve busy ,they will properly start thinking
like "death"
example :how would i die ?
where would i die
when will i die
teenage never thought of it ..
they only know that when we get old becoming old man like 70 plus would die
but thats not true!!
you know what i mean is just that when ya time is up they will just take ya away!!!!
After reading pls don't think too much .
It is just me.
what my thinking i will always type it out but not said
Life is just boring
sian

2008-09-22T03:57:00.000-07:00

People are becoming more greedy and greedy.why? because of money people can sacrifice alot of things even family .
Now even i've finish my exam
i just don understand why i still feel very boring like everythink is all the same nothing seem to change. i don understand myself at all i don't no why people want to study to future?
wat is future ? work? work? than continue the generation keep study and study? What do we live for? i don understand is just so boring life!!!!
when will it end?
haha

2008-09-18T09:06:00.001-07:00

想笑来伪装掉下的眼泪
xiang xiao lai wei zhuang diao xia de yan lei
Want to laugh to disguise the tears that’s flowing

点点头承认自己会怕黑
dian dian tou cheng ren zi ji hui pa hei
Nod my head to admit that I’m afraid of the dark

我只求能借一点的时间来陪
wo zhi qiu neng jie yi dian de shi jian lai pei
I only wish that you can spare some time for me

你却连同情都不给
ni que lian tong qing dou bu gei
But you don’t even give me the slightest sympathy

想哭来试探自己麻痹了没是
xiang ku lai shi tan zi ji ma bi le mei
Want to cry to see if I’m dead with out emotion yet

全世界好象只有我疲惫
quan shi jie hao xiang zhi you wo pi bei
It’s like in the whole world I’m the only one who’s exhausted

无所无所谓反正难过就敷衍走一回
wu suo wei fan zheng nan guo jiu fu yan zou yi hui
Doesn’t matter, because even if I’m down I can ignore my senses and just get it over and done with

但愿绝望和无奈远走高飞
dan yuan jue wang he wu nai yuan zou gao fei
Just wish that desperation will go away

天灰灰会不会
tian hui hui hui bu hui
The sky is gray

让我忘了你是谁
rang wo wang le ni shi shui
Will it make me forget who you are?

夜越黑梦违背难追难回味
ye yue hei meng wei bei nan zhui nan hui wei
The darker the night, the more misbehaving my dreams, hard to remember and ponder about them

我的世界将被摧毁也许事与愿违 (也许事与愿违)
wo de shi jie jiang bei cui hui ye xu shi yu yuan wei
My world is just about to be destroyed, maybe fate is against will

累不累睡不睡单影无人相依偎
lei bu lei shui bu shui dan ying wu ren xiang yi wei
Tired or not, want to sleep? Alone and nobody to pair up and snuggle with

夜越黑梦违背有谁肯安慰
ye yue hei meng wei bei you shui ken an wei
The darker the night, the more misbehaving my dreams, who is there to comfort me?

我的世界将被摧毁
wo de shi jie jiang bei cui hui
My world is about to be destroyed

也许颓废也是
ye xu tui fei ye shi
Maybe being blue is

想哭来试探自己麻痹了没
xiang ku lai shi tan zi ji ma bi le mei
Want to cry to see if I’m dead with out emotion yet

全世界好象只有我疲惫
quan shi jie hao xiang zhi you wo pi bei
It’s like in the whole world I’m the only one who’s exhausted

无所无所谓反正难过就敷衍走一回
wu suo wu suo wei fan zheng nan guo jiu fu yan zou yi hui
Doesn’t matter, because even if I’m down I can ignore my senses and just get it over and done with

但愿绝望和无奈远走高飞
dan yuan jue wang he wu nai yuan zou gao fei
Just wish that desperation will go away

天灰灰会不会
tian hui hui hui bu hui
The sky is gray

让我忘了你是谁
rang wo wang le ni shi shui
Will it make me forget who you are?

夜越黑梦违背难追难回味
ye yue hei meng wei bei nan zhui nan hui wei
The darker the night, the more misbehaving my dreams, hard to remember and ponder about them

我的世界将被摧毁也许事与愿违
wo de shi jie jiang bei cui hui ye xu shi yu yuan wei
My world is just about to be destroyed, maybe fate is against will

累不累睡不睡单影无人相依偎
lei bu lei shui bu shui dan ying wu reng xiang yi wei
Tired or not, want to sleep? Alone and nobody to pair up and snuggle with

夜越黑梦违背难追难回味
ye yue hei meng wei bei nan zhui nan hui wei
The darker the night, the more misbehaving my dreams, who is there to comfort me?

我的世界将被摧毁
wo de shi jie jiang be cui hui
My world is about to be destroyed

也许颓废也是 ~ 另一种美
ye xu tui fei ye shi ~ ling yi zhong mei
Maybe being blue is ~ another sort of beauty

2008-09-18T09:06:00.000-07:00

Every morning i wakes up is a new day and excited for later think that happen!!(my outerface thinking)
everymorning i wakes up is just stressing how to end the lying among ThE family.(my hearts thought)
i've always thinking why i was born to suffer in this world????
but i know some people thinks that when you are born to this world you are really very lucky!!!
NOT ME!!!
I just hate myself since the day that i've have done wrong things..regret?
whats the point of regreting when you started doing .
i'am really sick and tired of living !!!!
sucide haha i'am afraid of death but i uses alternative ways is call the slow pain death.
Alot of family conflicts between the family member ..some things i wishes to said but i cant something i wishes to change but i cant and between the family i'am the middle guy as i'am the only guy in it.so i know alot alot of things that my sister don even know.. i wanted to tell them but i cant i just cant i don want to let the family to shattered!!!!
THE FAMILY" is no longer my family anymore even i've said is just an action of my mouth but not my heart.
i listen to different storey between GM and AT
GM and AT is all my family..
i really don no who to believe anymore
i really don no what to do anymore
people tell me "don care about them just study come on ya future is still bright"
i really want to tell them this"what if now happen on you, will you still stop thinking?
after reading pls don feel sad for me as i'am not asking for any sympathy so fuck it!!
i just want to said something that i could not use my mouth to said

2006-06-17T06:32:00.000-07:00

right mind-you just can't forget her, but jus want to act like nothing.
left mind- so come on jus forget about her
right mind-but shes the one i hold her first and she lean on my shoulder first
left mind-thats nothing you can find one and have fun with her n jus kick her away.
right mind-so its that you call love?
left mind-of couse la
right mind-NO i won't do this think, cause y would you want to hurt more ppl and you are having fun ?
left mind-she done this to you first so wat if you hurt more girl out there jus move along man
right mind-MOVE on? move on your si lang tao..........
AT LAST I HAD MAKE UP THE MIND THAT I CHOOSE IS LEFT OR RIGHT

you will know which mind i choose when you know me

2006-05-20T03:27:00.000-07:00

WRONG THINGS
Everytime i think that i was hurt by her

But is i started hurting her

That is my retribution!!!!!!!